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A Mother’s Story
By Cindi
Kirkpatrick
June 7, 2006
info@cindiandtaylor.com
I began having difficulties with my teenage daughter.
Several months after the problems began my daughter, Taylor, decided
to leave school without permission – which, of course, was a bad
idea. I received a telephone call from Taylor’s school informing me
of what happened.
Just when I thought things could not possibly get any worse, I was
informed by school officials that she had been expelled. I could not
believe this was happening to us. With no schools available so late
into the final semester, and with her acting out and misbehaving, I
did not know what to do.
I found myself doing what many parents would do – looking for
answers on the Internet.
As I did a few random searches using key words and phrases like
“teen problems at home” and “help with my teen”, I received a number
of pop-up ads touting phrases like “Help My Teen” and “Teen
Solutions”, each one claiming to offer the same things.
They claimed to specialize in helping the troubled teen. They
claimed to have specialty and therapeutic boarding schools boasting
to promote education first and foremost, self-esteem, and respect
for authority … you name it, they had it. And, it all sounded great
… just what the doctor ordered.
Oh, and the biggest thing was that you did not have to be worried
about taking your teenager to them because they had a professional
transport group that would pick her up for a nominal fee of $1,500.
As I look back now, I still cannot believe that not only did I send
my only child away, but I let two strangers come into our home in
the wee hours of the morning to take my daughter away.
After eight days of hell slowly went by, I knew something was very
wrong. So I trusted my mother’s intuition, and I went to the school,
Carolina Springs Academy (CSA) to get her.
On my way to the school another CSA student’s mother called me on my
cell phone. After I shared all the horrible thoughts I had and
information from the articles I had read, she pleaded for me to pick
her daughter as well. I gladly agreed.
When I arrived, I could not believe my eyes – the building, the
grounds - nothing that I could see even came close to looking like
the beautiful pictures they have on their Web site. As I got out my
car, it seemed I had just entered a thick fog.
Even as I stepped onto the porch, things appeared to be strange,
right on down to the man raking … who by the way, would not even
look my way. The office was not very clean and had a musky smell.
When I told the office employee I was there to pick up my daughter,
she became – well let’s say - not so nice. When I went on to tell
her I was also picking up another child, she became downright rude.
When Tara Hall, the so-called Family Representative, finally arrived
at the office she was also unhappy with my arrival and decision. She
asked me, “Why? What had changed my mind?” When I shared with her
some of the articles I had found and printed out, she got angry and
said, “Well, you can’t believe everything you read, especially on
the Internet.”
I said to her, “you’re absolutely right.” As luck would have it, I
had articles regarding allegations of child abuse and neglect at
Carolina Springs Academy which I showed her. With that she got on
her walkie-talkie and ordered someone to bring the girls right away.
Of course when Taylor saw me she almost jumped out of the car before
it even stopped. I can’t begin to tell you how emotional that
reunion was, and still is. My heart hurt as I saw how dirty she was
– her hair, her clothes, her overall appearance was dirty. She even
smelled dirty. My heart hurt for her.
As I hurried the girls to my car, I felt as if everyone was
watching. The three of us agreed they all seemed to have that
far-away, foggy look in their eyes. The girls and I were crying so
hard you would think we would not have noticed them. But we did.
The drive home was unforgettable. We all felt so very grateful – for
the sun, the trees, and the wind that kissed our cheeks as we got
out of the car. The two girls told me so many horrible stories …
some I still can’t get out of my head, not to mention my heart. I’ve
told my daughter a hundred times how sorry I am for sending her
there.
I have nightmares - I can’t sleep at night – I am still having a
very difficult time forgiving myself for the entire CSA experience.
In fact, for as long as I live I do not believe I will ever be able
to forgive myself for allowing two complete strangers to enter my
daughter’s bedroom in the middle of the night, waking her from a
deep sleep, forcing her to get dressed as they watched, forcing her
into their car, and taking her away from her home and her family.
What was I thinking?
God help me, because I don’t know. I have nightmares about those two
strangers picking up my daughter and never bringing her back. All
the while, I’m running and searching for Taylor, and I can smell
that horrible smell. And then it gets so bad that I can’t breathe or
even move. That’s when I realize I’m no longer asleep.
Scared and confused, I get up to go watch my daughter sleep. I lay
there beside her and I take deep breaths just so I can smell her.
Then she notices I’m there, and says, “Mama it’s OK, I’m home, I’m
safe, and in some way or other it was meant for us to cross paths
with that so-called school. God sent us there so we could help
others.”
Her words are comforting and at some point we both drift back to
sleep. It has been almost a month since we’ve been home. At times it
seems she never left. But then night comes, and once again I
remember that horrible smell and the two strangers who took my
daughter in the middle of the night. This is when I find myself
praying to God to give me another chance. This is when I pray that
no one will have to go through what I do every time sleep comes.
Please take a moment to read Taylor's story.
Cindi
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